The One Leadership Skill Every EM Interviewer Looks For
When it comes to Engineering Manager interviews, one question interviewers are sure to ask is:
“How do you lead your team to perform at its best?”
The answer often boils down to one critical leadership skill: psychological safety.
It’s the difference between a team that shares bold ideas and one that stays silent. Between a team that learns from mistakes and one that fears failure.
1. Lead with Vulnerability
As leaders, we set the tone. Share your mistakes, own your failures, and show your team that it’s okay to not have all the answers.
Example:
In one of my first leadership roles, I underestimated a project’s complexity and promised a delivery date that was unrealistic. When we fell behind, I could see the frustration building in the team.
Instead of deflecting or doubling down, I addressed it in our retrospective:
“I misjudged the scope of this project and didn’t account for some of the challenges we’d face. That’s on me. Let’s work together to identify where we can adjust the plan moving forward.”
This simple act of owning my mistake opened the door for others to share blockers they’d been hesitant to bring up.
2. Build a No-Blame Culture
Fear of blame is the fastest way to shut down creativity and collaboration.
Creating a no-blame culture doesn’t mean ignoring accountability—it means focusing on solutions instead of pointing fingers.
Tips to foster a no-blame culture:
Focus retrospectives on learning: Ask “What happened?” and “What can we do differently next time?” instead of “Who’s at fault?”
Celebrate experiments, even when they fail.
Recognize that mistakes are part of growth.
When people know they won’t be punished for honest mistakes, they’re more willing to take risks that lead to innovation.
3. Encourage Curiosity
Great ideas come from asking great questions.
Create an environment where every question is welcome—even the “what ifs.”
Pro Tip: During team meetings, try saying:
“What’s one idea we haven’t explored yet?”
“What could we try if we weren’t constrained by X?”
Curiosity fuels creativity—and creativity drives innovation.
Why This Matters in EM Interviews
Psychological safety is a leadership skill that interviewers value highly.
You’ll often be asked:
“How do you build trust within your team?”
“How do you handle team mistakes or failures?”
Sharing how you foster psychological safety—through vulnerability, no-blame culture, and encouraging curiosity—demonstrates:
✅ Your ability to build high-performing teams.
✅ Your focus on team growth and collaboration.
✅ Your leadership mindset.
💡 Pro Tip: Back up your answers with real-world examples of how you’ve implemented these practices.
Resources to Learn More
📘 The Fearless Organization by Amy Edmondson: The go-to book on building psychological safety.
📘 Radical Candor by Kim Scott: A fantastic read on balancing caring personally and challenging directly.
🎙️ The WorkLife Podcast with Adam Grant: Episodes on psychological safety and innovation in teams.
📄 Google’s Project Aristotle: A deep dive into what makes teams effective (hint: psychological safety is #1).
🖋️ Creating a Culture of Trust and Psychological Safety in Engineering Organizations by Limor Bergman Gross.
🖋️ Creating a Culture of Psychological Safety in Engineering Teams by Sarah Gruneisen and Benjamin Augustin.
Psychological safety isn’t a buzzword—it’s the foundation for:
✅ Innovation: Teams that feel safe experiment and take risks.
✅ Collaboration: Open dialogue leads to better decisions.
✅ High Performance: When people feel safe, they give their best.
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Thanks for sharing!
One thing to add: it provides safety when there are processes in place. Onboarding, troubleshooting, development, etc. Team members would know what to do (and how to follow) when the team has such guideline and processes.